I am often criticized on my communication style by my peers. I come of as pushy, and I have zero tolerance for people with a loser attitude.(Loser attitude is to not have the willingness to figure things out, loser attitude is not taking responsibility and blaming other). I come to conclusions quickly without having the patience to listen to the other person’s point of view.

I recently had a paradigm shift because of reading the book, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and now I tend to step back and see the other person’s point of view before coming to conclusions.

I always believed that most people are good at heart. If that is the case, there should be very little conflicts in our society. If we are all good people and are seeking good things, why would we disagree with each other?

Yes, most people are good at heart, but they are not all seeking the greater good of the society, they are seeking the greater good for themselves, avoiding to harm anybody else. This paradim makes us think of other people as our enemies, opposites, or competition. If they win, I loose!!! If they win, I am a looser.

If your neighbor remodeled their home, if your co-worker got a promotion, You wish them well and celebrate their success! But do we really celebrate it in our hearts?

If a friend envies you, then he is not a true friend. - Ali (aka Imam Ali ben Abi Talib)

The other reason why we have conflict is because we are so blind sighted with the blur of selfishness that we ignore to understand the other person’s point of view, and hence they become our opposites/enemies/competition.